Bullet Point List #5,612

Lists allow me to put down all my random and incoherent thoughts on one page for your viewing (mocking) pleasure. And it is easier than sculpting a meaningful blog post. Me likey.

• I would be such an awesome rich person. Seriously, give me all your money, you won't be sorry.
• Regardless of what my sister tells you, November is awesome. thisclose to Christmas wonderfulness, but far enough away that you get to look forward to all the ensuing festivities and good times. PLUS, Thanksgiving turkey, dressing, mashed potatoes, and pumpkin pie? GET OUT OF TOWN.
• Sometimes I wonder why certain obscure bands get radio play [Kings of Leon] and some are tragically ignored [Mute Math]. Don't get me wrong, I like Kings of Leon and despite what J thinks, they earned their current level of fame. But I challenge you to listen to both Mute Math CDs, catch their concert, and watch their videos online and EXPLAIN to me why they aren't rolling in the mainstream fame and success they deserve. Although I have to say, I like it when really good bands don't have that one hit song plastered all over the radio non-stop until a once treasured melody makes my ears bleed. Plus, white people would have no indie music to brag about liking if they all got radio play. So I guess I will stop complaining. Or stop listening to the radio.
• Holy crap, start watching "Modern Family". Best new comedy of the year [votes taken from me and tallied by me].
• Who else wishes they had thought of Jim Halpert's Halloween get-up first? Who will admit it took them in excess of 5 minutes to actually figure out what his costume meant? Just me? Well then ok.
• I have been craving Layne's for a week now. I might crack if I don't get my fix soon. If you have ever lived in College Station, you probably know what I mean.
• Ever notice how when you work in an office, things that are supposed to be fun, like say "Secret Santa" or "CSR Bingo", always end up turning into just another set of rules and regulations that you have to follow and be held accountable for, laced with guidelines that must be met based upon standards that are ridiculous and/or unattainable for everyone, until your boss has eventually sucked all the potential fun out of the activity? No? Just my office?

Donkeys

Today, I realized I have a problem. Today, I realized that my instinct leads me to run out the door half dressed and frantic and then finish getting ready for work in the car upon discovery of a roach loose in the house (and from here on out in this blog I will use code word "donkey" to signify this demonic creature- the term my family and friends are familiar with using on a regular basis so that I don't have to HEAR the name, as the mere thought frightens me so. Crap. I am already sounding like a crazy person and this is just the "parenthesis back story"). I am sure everyone has their odd "fear" or endearing "quirk". Well this is mine (although the countless people that have been called upon to rescue me from this precious quirk would hardly call it "endearing" I am sure.) I have always known I was a little overdramatic and ridiculous when it came to donkeys, but I don't think I quite grasped it until I began living by myself. Apparently, all these years of having roommates and family to do the dirty work for me, has shielded me from just how much I cannot handle killing a bug 1/5000th my size [made up fraction.] Logically, yes, I know it can't do anything to me. But try to convince me of that when it is just sitting there, silently plotting my demise, awaiting its next move so it can attack when I least expect it.

Slightly helpful email exchange today between my sister and I:

Me: I feel anxious that I can't go in my house until later this afternoon. What if it has eaten everything before J kills it? Do you think it is just sitting there being evil or is it all over my stuff? I really have a problem.

K: hahahahahahahahahahahahaha

Me: Stop laughing and do your job as my sister and put my fears to rest!!! Tell me something comforting like "I am sure it is dead by now" or "Donkeys only crawl on the wall, your stuff is fine." or "It is probably just sitting in the same spot where you left it." COME ON. Help the crazy, don't hinder.

K: It probably IS dead. I'm sure your apartment complex exterminates regularly, most of them exterminate every 3 months. And even if it isn't dead for some reason, they don't generally go crawling all over everything. And it certainly isn't EATING anything.

OK so it probably isn't eating everything. Slight overreaction there. But I am STILL not walking in that house until J comes to rescue me this afternoon (thank God for him) lest it flies at me like a spider monkey of death. And I am still going to fully disinfect my house and wash all sheets, towels, etc. Send for help. I have reached a new level of paranoia.

Ways In Which I Am Becoming My Parents.

Wow, it has been a month since I have blogged. I'm back!

I have always been told (more often than not by my own mother) to "be nice to your mother because someday you will turn into her". As a naive youth, I scoffed "No, not me! That's crazy speak!" Well I am here today to validate that this does, indeed, happen eventually, whether you want it to or not. And you might become your dad too.

Yesterday was a perfect example.

Instance #1: Background info for this story: When I was in high school, my friend and I were hanging out in our small podunk town one evening when I received this frantic call from my mother: "Are you ok!?!? I just heard an ambulance!!" Not as in "I saw you in an accident when I was driving by" or "heard someone with a car like yours had a wreck", just checking in the general sense of "I heard a siren somewhere, in some part of town and had a panic attack." Overprotective? Yes. But ultimately, I chalked it up to mom being cute and I laugh about it to this day.
Well, yesterday, before I could even realize what I was doing, I was leaving a voicemail for my friend who lives in the vacinity of a street where I was driving past and saw ambulances. You know, just to make sure she was ok. Yes, it's as silly as it sounds. She's fine by the way. May still be laughing at me though.

Instance #2: I actually proved I am turning into my father as well. Background info for this story: My dad NEVER stacks plates after a meal. NEVER. He claims that it is ridiculous to do so because then you have to wash BOTH sides of the plate. We all know much better than to ever break this cardinal rule in his presence. And while I see his point to an extent (and it makes sense in family gatherings to humor him as he is the only one that ever does the dishes), I always join in with others to lovingly mock him for his adamant stance on dishwashing techniques.
Cut to last night- I was having dinner with my boyfriend and his sister and bro-in-law, and as J offers to take my plate, I actually grimaced as the bottom of my plate grazed the top of his. He has been warned how my father is about this, so he knew exactly where the look came from, and therefore I was immediately mocked. Apparently this is one habit that will forever be ingrained in my psyche. So take note: apparently there will be no stacking of plates in MY presence now.

My parents are great, so hooray I am turning into them and not, say, Paris Hilton. But still. Tis creepy.

Happy Get Out of My Cubicle and Stop Sending Me Emails Day!

I would like to dedicate this day to the hardworking, underpaid, hardly appreciated employees out there that suffer continuously from the micromanaging, controlling, "I'm better than you" complex driven individuals that push us to the brink of insanity on a daily basis. You know, your bosses. Today is for anyone who has ever said "Hey, my boss is kind of annoying." or "No ma'am, I have not had a chance to do that yet because you just sent me the email 5 seconds ago and it is not the only thing I have to do today and emailing me 5 more times in rapid succession does not make me work any faster." or "Please, don't set that guy on fire. It's not funny. But rather quite illegal." (No seriously. This really happened to someone I know.)

I apologize if you are a boss and feel that I am giving bosses everywhere a bad name. I am sure YOU are the perfect boss and your employees love you and everything you do. Yes, I am quite sure of it.

But if you are treated at times as a lowly underling like me, then you must know exactly where I am coming from. Unless you are employed by one of the perfect bosses mentioned above. In which case, I spit on you. Not really. Hire me?

I shant say another word, lest I be persecuted for my insubordination. But just know, my fellow cubicle inhabitants, this day's for you, and there is someone else out there, somewhere, wishing they too could chunk their stapler at people's heads. Underlings Unite.

Today's Talking Points

• Yes, I would say some sort of revamping of the notification system should occur. Ugh, poor family.
• I'm with sweet little Taylor on this one. Yes, Kanye is a total jerkface, but is that really anything we didn't already know? I am glad the media went off on him, because he totally deserved it. But this is NOT the first time he has pulled some kind of crap like this. Why don't we all just start ignoring him and other similar celebrity fools and maybe when they realize they can't get publicity anymore they will finally GO AWAY. Just a thought.
• Really don't know what to think of this yet. Could be hilarious. But on the other hand, why not have just 3 judges again? It was a better format. They all talk too much anyway. And besides, what authority does Ellen have on musical talent? I realize how unimportant this is in the greater scheme of things. Humor my unnecessary concern.
• You so should be watching GLEE.
• Has anyone seen the "new" Jay Leno show yet? Is it worth wasting dvr space?
• Interesting. I feel like there is some kind of deep intellectual commentary in here somewhere about the importance of social networks and instant communication in our society. Meh.
• Seriously? Racism is a horrible thing. But jumping to this conclusion for the next 4 years everytime someone disagrees with the President? Insulting and inaccurate. Man should not have blurted out "You Lie"- that was disrespectful indeed. But COME ON.
• In entertaining fake news... Small inside joke to Amy: GONE WITH THE WIND! STONEHENGE!

9.11

Still get choked up watching footage. I don't think anyone will ever forget where they were when it all played out. Very important to remember what happened. God bless our soldiers protecting us today. This day always makes me feel extremely proud of my country. God Bless America.

Sex On Fire

Saw this on my sister's blog, thought it looked fun.

Here’s the rules: Put your iTunes on shuffle. For each question, press the next button to get your answer. Use that song name, no matter how silly it sounds!

IF SOMEONE SAYS “IS THIS OKAY,” YOU SAY?
"15 Step" - Radiohead

WHAT WOULD BEST DESCRIBE YOUR PERSONALITY?
"City of Blinding Lights" - U2
Because I am so beautiful.

WHAT DO YOU LIKE IN A GUY/GIRL?
"Daylight" - Jump Little Children
Happiness? Joy?

HOW DO YOU FEEL TODAY?
"Release the Stars" - Rufus Wainwright
Ready for bed.

WHAT IS YOUR LIFE’S PURPOSE?
"My Big Mouth"- Oasis
To talk a lot I suppose. Done and done.

WHAT IS YOUR MOTTO?
"Electric Renaissance" - Belle & Sebastian
Heck yes, I like that.

WHAT DO YOUR FRIENDS THINK OF YOU?
"Slipped Away (the ballad of Lauretha Vaird)" - G. Love & Special Sauce
I certainly hope not.

WHAT DO YOU THINK ABOUT VERY OFTEN?
"Groove Is In the Heart" - Deee-Lite
I do like to dance. Stop laughing that this is on my ipod.

WHAT IS 2+2?
"Headphones" - Fall Out Boy
Obviously.

WHAT DO YOU THINK OF YOUR BEST FRIEND?
"Now That You're Home" - Manchester Orchestra
Hmm.

WHAT DO YOU THINK OF THE PERSON YOU LIKE?
"E-Pro" - Beck
He's a pro!

WHAT IS YOUR LIFE STORY?
"Back At Your Door" - Maroon 5
There's my perservering spirit.

WHAT DO YOU WANT TO BE WHEN YOU GROW UP?
"Keep Fishin'" - Weezer
I hate fishing.

WHAT DO YOU THINK WHEN YOU SEE THE PERSON YOU LIKE?
"Windowsill" - The Arcade Fire
When do I NOT think about windowsills is the better question.

WHAT DO YOUR PARENTS THINK OF YOU?
"Hang Me Up to Dry" - The Cold War Kids
Again, hmm.

WHAT WILL YOU DANCE TO AT YOUR WEDDING?
"Die Die Die" - Dr. Dog
I don't think that could have worked out better.

WHAT WILL THEY PLAY AT YOUR FUNERAL?
"Death By Chocolate" - Sia
I was wrong. THAT worked out way better. What a way to go.

WHAT IS YOUR HOBBY/INTEREST?
"Rhythm Sticks" - Blackalicious
Hahahahaha. Laughing at band name too. This must be some of Jason's music.

WHAT IS YOUR BIGGEST SECRET?
"It's Not a Fashion Statement, It's a Deathwish" -My Chemical Romance
My fashion is offensive.

WHAT DO YOU THINK OF YOUR FRIENDS?
"One Song Glory" -Adam Pascal (from RENT)
Yes they are.

WHAT’S THE WORST THING THAT COULD HAPPEN?
"You Don't Know How It Feels"- Tom Petty
And you wouldn't if that worse thing happened so why even tell you.

HOW WILL YOU DIE?
"Zombie Zoo"- Tom Petty
I certainly hope not. Sounds creepy.

WHAT IS THE ONE THING YOU REGRET?
"Love You Madly" - Cake
You in particular.

WHAT MAKES YOU LAUGH?
"Broadway" - Goo Goo Dolls
Sometimes.

WHAT MAKES YOU CRY?
"Mansion in the Valley" - The M's
Tears of joy.

WILL YOU EVER GET MARRIED?
"Never Is a Promise" - Fiona Apple
WOAH. Ouch. Guess I should stock up on some cats.

WHAT SCARES YOU THE MOST?
"Sexy Ladies"- Justin Timberlake
hahahahahahaha.

DOES ANYONE LIKE YOU?
"Carry You" - Jimmy Eat World
Nonsensical.

IF YOU COULD GO BACK IN TIME, WHAT WOULD YOU CHANGE?
"This Time of Year" - Better Than Exra
Not so actually.

WHAT HURTS RIGHT NOW?
"Raining in Baltimore" - Counting Crows
Indeed.

WHAT WILL YOU POST THIS AS?
"Sex on Fire" - Kings of Leon
This will surely get the readers sucked in.